Memories
by royalbluexorcistlee
Summary: Memories are precious…especially with the person you love the most. So never stop making much, much more even if it means you'll just lose it at the end. NanoFate! Plz Read and Review!
1. Chapter 1

Yo readers! *cheers for my second Fanfic! So…I am sincerely, humbly, pleading to all the NanoFate writers there! Come back to life, please! This Fic is for you! We need more NanoFate English fanfictions here!

Anyway, again, English isn't my first language so I apologize in advance for some grammatical errors you'll notice. I'm not a pro so please no flames. So! On to the story! AU!

Edited: I re-upload this chapter because when I reread this part, it feels like a trash. Well, it may still be a trash...but maybe it became a better trash now. (I may re-upload the other chapters too, but I really feel lazy now so maybe some other time...a time that may not come lol)

Disclaimer: I don't own Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha

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" _You don't have to worry...as long as you remember...I'm fine with this."_

 **Memories**

"Good morning, Fate-chan!" my childhood friend, Nanoha Takamachi, greeted as she saw me near the school gate. Her smile as radiant as ever. I waved back in response and greeted her as well. "The weather's good today, want to go somewhere after school?" _An invitation early in the morning? Nanoha is becoming bold, I see._ I smiled to myself and decided to tease the brunette a little.

"You mean like a date?" I asked innocently waiting for her blushing face to appear...and she didn't fail me once again. _How cute._

"W-what?" she stuttered "I-it's not like t-that! I mean...we normally hang-out together, right?!"

I just grinned in response and walked a little ahead of her "So where do you want to go, princess?"

She walked closer to me as she thought of a good place to hang-out, "How about the carnival?" _A carnival, huh?_ I looked to my watch then walked a little faster.

"If that's what you want, I don't really mind" I said as I hastily grabbed her hand then started to run. She seemed shock for a second so I explained myself immediately.

"We're going to be late"

 **Memories**

Class dismissal finally came and we quickly gathered our things for our different errands. When I was about to stand up, Nanoha suddenly appeared in front of me...with a frown visible on her face.

"Fate-chan" she said with a cold voice. _I wonder what did I do this time?_ "You forgot it, don't you?"

 _Forgot? What?_

"Uhm...could you elaborate your question, please?" I smiled sheepishly hoping for her glare to lessen...but I obviously failed. She sighed as she put her hand on her waist and the other to my desk.

"Why do you always...uhh nevermind" Nanoha said exhausted. She looked at me and finally cleared what she's saying all this time, "You forgot our dat-" she cleared her throat "I mean our hang-out after school"

"We have one today?" I asked idiotically while tilting my head as I felt a hard smack on my head coming from Nanoha. "Ouch!"

"Fate-chan! You're always like that!" she shouted, her face becoming redder and redder. It's true, this past few days I always forget things I shouldn't forget... _It's not like I want to though..._ "Is it not important to you?!" _Oh jeez...good thing our classmates already left the classroom..._

"Nanoha, it's not like that" I responded to calm her down "Of course it's important to me..."

"Then why do you always..." she asked again as little tears started to form on her oceanic eyes. I stood up from my chair and patted her head while smiling gently.

"Want a creep?"

She stared at me with disbelief but nonetheless nodded her head like the cutest thing in the world.

 _Yep, Nanoha is definitely the cutest._

 **Memories**

"Let's try the horror house" I pointed to a quite huge house with a 'horror house' sign board written with a blood-like color. Nanoha froze on her spot and stopped eating her creep. _Oh...I definitely like this..._

"Oh! Let's try the Ferris wheel, Fate-chan!" she abruptly shouted as she pointed her index finger at the huge machine where you could see the whole city. _That won't work tho._ I smirked as I hold her hand suddenly.

"In movies, that thing always appears at the end" I tightened my grip on her hand to be sure she can't escape. "So we're going to the horror house first"

"Nooooooo!" she shouted as she tried her best to get out of my grasp, little droplets of sweat visible on her face already "I want the Ferris Wheel first!"

"Eh? Could it be that you're scared, Nanoha?" I asked the 'most obvious thing in the world', but knowing this brunette, she will deny it even if it kills her.

"W-what?!" _Figures_ "W-why would I?"

"Then let's go!" I practically pulled her towards her _horror_ without any mercy. I know she already have little tears in her eyes...but I couldn't let this chance pass! "Let's have a bet, Nanoha"

"Huh?" Hearing what I said, she curled her eyebrows in confusion "What kind of bet?"

"If you could last there inside of the horror house for ten minutes, you could have me as your slave for a day" she seemed to brighten at that, _I'm not done though_ I moved closer to her until my lips almost touched her ears "But if I win...I'll have you all for myself for a day"

The bright smile she was having on her face was immediately replaced by a furious blush. I can't help but chuckle at her reaction.

"Deal?"

Coming back to her senses, Nanoha hesitantly nodded. "P-prepare yourself, Fate-chan" she said with a forced serious face "This is a piece of cake!" I took out my phone from my pocket and clicked the stop watch. I stared at Nanoha's back as she walked towards the Horror House despite having her knees shaking a little. _If only I could remember this moment too..._

"Hey, Fate-chan? Are you ready?" Nanoha asked as she finished hyperventilating and a little stretching too. She curled her eyebrows worriedly when she didn't hear a response. _That's right...she shouldn't know...she's a worry rat, anyway._

"Shouldn't you be asking that to yourself?" I grinned as she pouted her cheeks really annoyed. "Ready?" she nodded her head and gave me a proud smile.

"Bring it on!"

"Well then, run inside at my signal...

Go!"

 **Memories**

It's been five minutes since Nanoha entered the horror house...I know she might make it and win the bet...either way I'm okay with it, as long as I could make more and more memories with her...happy memories that even when that time comes...I won't regret anything. She's not a friend to me anymore...she surpassed that level long time ago...I want to tell her that...but she deserves someone more than me...a person who could stay by her side and...

"Gyaaaaaaahhh!"

"Nanoha!"

I panicked and then ran as fast as possible inside the horror house. _I'm certain that it's Nanoha's voice! I should-! Wait a second..._ I stopped and stood straight abruptly. _I think I'm overreacting here...this is a horror house, Fate! Of course she will shout like that at some moment!_ I slightly punched myself for being an idiot and then still proceeded to walk inside. Now that I'm here in this house, I should just search for Nanoha.

 **PUMP.**

I fell on my knees as I felt a sudden pang in my head. _Oh shoot...of all moment...why now?_ I tried to suppress my voice as I don't want anyone to hear me...especially her... _but I think I couldn't take it anymore...my brain is like being torn into two...it hurts...it hurts so much!_

"Fate...?"

 _no...please not her..._

"Fate?!" she rushed to my side and kneel down beside me "What happened?!" she asked panicking.

"Nanoha..." I murmured with little energy I have "Don't worry...I'm okay...really" _Wow, I still managed to smile._

"Don't joke around!" she snapped "You're not obviously okay!" _I don't even know now who's in better condition...Nanoha's really sweating a lot..._

"I'm fine as long as I could take my medicine..." I searched inside my pocket to find my medicine. _It really doesn't taste good...but I couldn't afford to be picky here..._ "You should calm down, Nanoha"

"Fate-chan..." she's still holding me tightly...and it hurts a little...but I understand. I'm going to explain it all today.

 **Memories**

"Remember that accident when we were ten?" I said breaking the silence that's growing bigger and bigger. Nanoha nodded still holding my hand all this time. We are now sitting at one of the benches on the carnival. The crowd were almost gone because it's pretty late already.

"The doctor said it affected my brain..." Nanoha didn't respond but I felt her grip on my hand tightened. "He said that...bit by bit...my memories of the past and as of now...will slowly...will slowly..." Nanoha suddenly hugged my tightly...her head buried on my bosom.

"It will all fade away..."

"H-hey...y-you're j-joking, right? Fate-chan?" Nanoha asked crying while still hugging me and trembling "that can't be...tell me this is just a joke...Fate-chan..."

"I wish I could..." I replied quietly. I smiled gently as I broke the hug a little to look at her eyes.

"S-so..that means...you'll forget...you'll forget all about me...?" _That's the last thing I want you to know..._ I gripped my hand but still trying my best to have that smile on my face "All the memories we shared...all...all the feelings we build for each other...you'll forget all of them? F-Fate-chan?" _This is why I don't want you to know...I don't want to see you crying this much..._ she hugged herself, crying more and more...and I couldn't say anything... "I don't want that!" _Nanoha..._

I pulled her closer and hugged her tightly. _Give me anything but this fragile form of yours..._ "Nanoha...I may forget everything...even my feelings for you...but you're here..." I cupped her cheeks as I wiped her tears "You'll remember everything, right?" New tears started to form on her eyes as she put her head on my chest again.

"B-but that's! That's too cruel!" Nanoha sobbed "It's not fair that I'm the only one who remembers everything!"

I shook my head, "That's enough for me" I hold her hand and look through her oceanic blue eyes "As long as you could have happy memories with me before I could forget everything...that's enough for me. I mean, of course I don't want to forget everything...especially you..." _ah I couldn't hold back my tears anymore...but I still need to smile...for her._ "I don't want these feelings I have for you to vanish...but I couldn't do anything, right? It's fate, it's my fate."

"B-but! There must be a way!" Nanoha practically shouted as she shook her head and grabbed me at my shoulders, "There must be-"

"I'm sorry..." I interrupted "I'm afraid we could do nothing. If we do...my brain will stop functioning." I smirked to her as if I'm just joking around...but no. "The truth is...I should have died in that accident five years ago. My brain was almost not working at all...I'm in a coma. But the doctors really tried their best and had searched for a way to save me...and that's why they came up with this solution. As if restarting my brain again. All this years starting from that accident...bit by bit...I'm forgetting about my past"

"Fate-chan..."

"Nanoha...I love you. Even if that means I have to restart our meeting, as long as I could live with you again, I don't mind it." I hold her hand again as I smiled as gently as possible. "So, when the time comes that I forget everything in this world...everything about you...would you help me remember them? Narrate it all to me...make me fall in love with you all over again."

She cried again. So much. I couldn't even think where she could pull all of that... There were light screams mixed with her sobbing...but now, I'm certain that she understands my situation.

"F-Fate..." she murmured while still crying and wiping her tears uselessly "I-I... I love you too... so much...I love you, Fate-chan" with that simple sentence...I didn't notice that even I...was crying already. "D-don't worry...I'll make you fall in love with me again!" I smiled as she showed me her resolve.

"That's right...make me confess to you again" I'm really glad that there were no visitors now...because I was hugging her so much. Nanoha nodded her head in response.

"I'm going to make you crazy for me...Fate-chan"

"I don't really mind that" I was going to break the hug but Nanoha suddenly pulled me again but now her hands were around my neck...connecting our lips with a warm kiss... _So this is what it feels like...does someone stop the time? If so, please just continue...I want this to last forever._

After a long moment, we finally pulled apart to each other.

"I'm going to make you remember that as much as you want" Nanoha said out of the blue with a light blush on her face.

"Please do" I grinned like an idiot as I pulled her to another hug and took out my camera. "Show this to me, okay?" I said as I clicked it with the count of three.

"Say...sweet!"

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.

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"Fate-chan...I will never forget anything..."

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 **A/N** : Thank you for reading! I'm not sure if this is a one shot…but let's see, okay? I had fun writing this, so I hope you enjoyed it too as much as I do. Oh yeah, I almost forgot writing that kissing scene at the end…and I still feel kinda awkward.

Please review! Reviews could serve like a fuel for writers…so please do! Let me here (read) what you have in mind.

Ja ne!


	2. Memories: Diary

Hello again readers! So I actually decided to continue this…and yeah...when I finally finished it…I thought I shouldn't have continued this after all. Lol. I just think I messed-up. But oh well, I took the time to write it so might as well post it! And there you have it! Chapter two!

And I forgot to say! They don't have powers in this story! Everyone's normal! ...well except, of course, to Hayate. She's never been normal, anyway.

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Magical Lyrical Nanoha**

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 _Uh…the light…it's too bright...Eh? I can't move my fingers….am I dead? Nah, impossible…maybe I'm dreaming? A Lucid dream? But I could really feel someone's touching my hand…. Na…Nanoha? What are you doing here? Wait, are you crying? Why? And…this smell…it's very familiar…the mixed scent of different medicines…._

 _So I'm here again, huh?_

 _In the Hospital…._

"Fate-chan?" I heard Nanoha murmured as I moved my head a little from the pillow.

"Good morning, Nanoha..." I smiled as I tried my best to look in her eyes "That is, if it's still morning…"

Without notice, or warning, I was suddenly engulfed by a long passionate kiss by the girl beside me. She's pinning me and putting some harsh force into the kiss…pushing me harder in the bed…it's as if she waited for this in years…and it's not like I'm complaining but…it's too early in the morning!

After we pulled apart, I can't help but blurted what I have in thought all that moment…

"I still didn't brush my teeth"

She just giggled at my pouting face without any regret for her act "I think that just made it a lot sweeter" _What's this pervert doing here?!_ "Good morning, Fate-chan"

"Say, Nanoha…" I looked at her like she's a criminal "How many times did you do that while I'm asleep?"

"E-eh?!" she blushed, _Now it's my time for revenge!_ "D-do what?!"

"How many times did you kiss me while I'm asleep" I repeated while grinning to her. I don't know if she really did that though but I just want to tease her. It's a ritual.

"I-I didn't do t-that!" she shouted defensively while still blushing "I mean…W-well…maybe a few t-times" _She really did it?!_

What's good with being ill is that no one could _hurt_ you… so I burst into laughter in my heart's content as she confessed her crime to me. I can't believe she really did it! Am I slumbering that long?

"Hey, Fate-chan…" Nanoha muttered as she looked at the ground with gloomy eyes "That accident five years ago…it's my fault…right?" _Nanoha…pouting is so much better than that expression._

I looked at the ceiling as I remained silent for a little while.

"The truth is…I don't actually remember what had happened that time…"

I smiled as I turned my head to Nanoha…only to see her pulling out something from her side and it looks like my… _Eh?! Don't tell me it's-!_

"Then your diary will really help us now"

"Wha-! How did you get it!? Or more importantly…Why are you holding that?!" I panicked as I tried to get it back. No use. I can only move my head! "Nanoha! Don't open it!"

"Geez Fate-chan, we'll just see what had happened that time" she smirked evilly as she slowly opened my diary _without_ any hesitation.

"But it's personal! My property! And that's trespassing!"

"Fate-chan, I already invaded your property long time ago" she smiled proudly as she searched where she should start reading. _You're merciless!_ "Found it! I must say your hand writing is pretty impressive, Fate-chan"

 _But all I care is my privacy…!_

" _Dear Bardich_ …Bardich's your diary's name?" I nodded my head quite embarrassed "It's cute" _Ah! That's why I love you, Nanoha!_

Nanoha looked at my Diary again then started to precede reading.

" _Today's our summer camp! We're going to a super tall mountain! And! And…!"_

 **Memories: Diary**

"Woooooow!"

We all said in unison as we got enthralled by the scenery in our face. A wide, vast, green field…surrounded by trees taller than my parents or even to those Wrestlers I saw on Televisions! I could hear the refreshing sound of the river nearby mixed with the soft sounds the birds were making. The sky is in good condition…I doubt it will rain today.

"Fate-chan!" Nanoha called-out as she ran to me followed by Hayate. They were having big smiles on their faces. "We saw a Bear on the way here!"

"R-really?!" I asked surely getting excited too.

"Yes! It's sleeping that time and it's soooo cute!" Nanoha exclaimed as she grabbed my hand "Let's check it later!"

I nodded my head in response, wanting to see that cute Bear too. I wonder how big it is…Ah! I can't contain my excitement!

"I would like to agree to that idea as well but I'm afraid it's too dangerous for us, NanoFate" Hayate disagreed pulling down our plan. _Wait, NanoFate?_

"Hayate, what's NanoFate?" Nanoha asked being curious too.

"Nanoha and Fate" Hayate replied simply, but I could see something behind that mischievous smile. "Geez guys…I just made it short"

"But I think I saw that word from one of your fanfictions…" I asked remembering the time and place and the fanfiction where I saw that word.

"Y-you saw what?!" Hayate screamed for her life as her eyes widen like the biggest eyes in the world "What did you see?!"

I shook my head as I responded "I can't remember it" but I'm pretty sure I saw it somewhere…. Hayate sighed in relief, putting her hand on her chest like her life was just been saved.

"Hey dumb Kids! Don't go around all by yourself, okay?" our sensei shouted at us while having a strict face….or more likely a creepy face.

"D-dumb?!" Hayate repeated quite irritated though I think she's just playing around…Sensei always calls us like that "But you look much, much dumber than us!"

"W-what did you say!?" and that's the cue for Hayate to run…but not after saying something again _You're a masochist, Hayate…._

"…Your girlfriend even assumed you're a gay! Kidding!"

"Haaaayate!"

"Hayate never changed, huh?" Nanoha said as we both sighed "But I guess that what makes her special"

 _And I could only agree to that._

"Let's set the tent, Nanoha"

 **Memories: Diary**

"And that's how fairies got their wings…" Hayate said as she ended her theory about ' _How Roosters got to be a Dinosaur'_. I sighed as it sounds convincing but at the same time fanciful… _I mean…What does sexual immorality got to do with that?!_

The sun had already set, some of the students were already sleeping…we are about to join them too, but Hayate insisted to have a small chit-chat before going to sleep…but it turned-out of her giving theories in most-useless-facts in the world while having a bon fire in the midst of us.

"So…we really came from an Ape?" Vita asked who seems to be hypnotized by Hayate's beliefs. _Don't enter the darkness! Vita!_

Hayate smirked as she put her arms in her chest in a proud manner "It came from your mouth, my friend" _Oh no! Vita's being engulfed now!_

"If that's true…then why do you look like a raccoon?"

 _Silence_

 _I didn't saw that coming from Vita…And here I thought she will be engulfed now!_

"Okay, here's another theory! Do you really think Otakus were just normal beings? Well that's-"

"Uh…it's kind of late now…what do you think we should do?" I interrupted Hayate before she could give another mind breaking Theory "And you're forbidden to answer that question, Hayate"

"You're too cruel, Fate-chan" Hayate pouted as she zipped her mouth.

"What about playing a Courage Test?" Arisa suggested having a grin on her face.

"E-eh?!" Nanoha immediately responded with a flustered face "B-B-But-!"

"Nanoha's a scaredy-cat, I see" Arisa teased causing for all of us to laugh "Well, Courage Test needs a partner so you shouldn't be that scared"

"Good idea Arisa!" Hayate enthusiastically shouted as she stood-up from the wooden chair "Let's have a draw who-should-partner-who!"

"I'll just join if Fate-chan's my partner" Nanoha murmured, suddenly making me blush furiously. Everyone looked at me and I just nodded in response to them.

"Well if that's the case…you two should be the first" Hayate smirked while giving thumbs-up "That's the exchange of picking your partner"

"E-eh?!" Nanohas responded as she showed to us a horrified face. I stood-up from my chair too then walked beside her.

"Don't worry Nanoha, you have me" I said as I patted her shoulder giving as well my confident smile. She smiled too and nodded her head in response, taking my hand tightly.

"Don't ever let go of my hand, okay?"

 **Memories: Diary**

"Are you ready NanoFate?" Hayate asked using that weird acronym again "There's a river one kilometer from here, just fill that bottle you're holding and everything's done" she instructed as she pulled-out a stop watch "Team with shortest time wins"

"Let's do our best Nanoha" I cheered trying to remove Nanoha's nervousness. She's kinda sweating besides the fact that it's really cold right now "I'll protect you, don't worry"

Nanoha stared at me for a while then tried her best to smile "Un! Fate-chan!" she nodded her head twice then gripped my hand that was holding hers all this time, harder.

"Okay, lovey doveys! At my signal!" Hayate interrupted as she put her hand in the air. Preparing us for the Courage Test.

"Go!"

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.

.

It's really dark…good thing we both have flashlights in our hands making our path clear enough to pass through. The cold breeze made me shiver a bit…and it's really quiet you could die from it. Tall trees surrounded us like giant monsters and the quarter moon didn't actually help the scenery to be more composed.

I could feel Nanoha's grip became tighter and tighter…but I know she's doing her best to overcome her fear.

"Hey, Nanoha" I blurted breaking the silence, trying to create a calm ambiance "What made you scared of ghosts?"

"H-huh?" her face flushed a little at the question as she looked at her side "W-well…it's my brother's fault…when I was younger…it became he's routine to freak me out in Horror Movies, Horror House and night camps…all the places where there's only darkness"

I was about to chuckle when she added something in her speech.

"The truth is…I only agreed to join this camp because I know you're here, Fate-chan"

 _Nanoha…now how should I response to that? I could only blush!_

Good thing we suddenly heard some weird sound…or was that bad? Yes it's really bad! Because it's a big black bear!

"T-that's the bear we saw this morning!" Nanoha shouted quite panicking. _That's it?!_

"W-well, it doesn't really look cute at all!" I shouted as the black Bear growled in front of us. Making us take few steps backwards.

"He's cute while he's sleeping…" Nanoha responded as she gripped my shirt with her free hand "F-Fate-chan…what should we do?"

 _What should we do? What should we do?! Think! If we run now, there's a big chance we could be caught. But if we don't, we won't stand a chance against this black Bear! So what should we do?! Think Fate!_

"Fate-chan…" Nanoha called as the distance between the Bear and us gets shorter and shorter.

"Nanoha…turn-off your flashlight…" I murmured as I turned-off mine. Nanoha did what I say and so our surrounding was engulfed with darkness. I let go of her hand and gulped and took a deep breath then…

"Run!" I shouted as Nanoha took a dash away from the Bear...I throw the flashlight to the bear distracting its attention as I took my dash too. We ran very fast and Nanoha was in front me….but because of the darkness…I didn't notice…

 _A cliff…?!_

"Nanoha stop!" I shouted desperately trying to grab her hand…but I was too late… _I was too late!_

"Gyaaaaaahhh!" Nanoha shouted as she fall into the dark abyss _No. We shouldn't have run! I shouldn't let go of her hand!_

"Nanoha!" I ran as fast as I can to take hold of her hand again. And thank God I made it in time. I clutched Nanoha's hand as tightly as possible…pulling her up with all my energy "Don't worry, I got you" we made it, we were safe, Nanoha's safe…that is, if the ground we're standing-in didn't collapse.

"Fate-chan!"

 _I made the wrong decision…I let go of her hand…I let her to be in danger…this is my entire fault!_

I pulled Nanoha into a hugged in the air, pulling her as close as possible. It's really deep…and I couldn't see a thing where we could hold unto.

 _I won't let you get hurt!_

I'm scared…I'm scared of getting hurt…of not making out alive here…but I'm more scared of losing you…of letting you get hurt…that's why…

 _I'll protect you!_

"Nanoha, just close your eyes…" I murmured to her ear enveloping her as tightly as possible "Everything will be fine" _Yes…everything will be fine…I'll…I'll…_

"F-Fate-chan…"

 _I'll protect you_

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.

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"F-Fate-chan…? Fate-chan?! Hey Fate-chan?! Wake-up! Wake-up please! You're…you're covered with blood…no…please…s-someone help us…this can't be…Fate-chan wake-up!"

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 **A/N:** So…what do you think? Did I mess-up? I really think I do. But that said! I decided to finish this story! I can't let this end here, now could I? And maybe I'll change the point of view to Nanoha because Fate's forgetting her past.

And I'm saying this phrase again…please review! Reviews are cool! But the reviewers are much cooler! That's true!

Ja ne!


	3. Memories: It's me your lover

**Oh yeah! At last I finally finished rewriting this chapter! *cheers* So I'm really in tears now T^T and what I only hope is that all of you would like this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing this in the middle of the night without sleeping at all :D it's currently Five seventeen now in the morning and I'm the only one awake while listening to Megurine Luka's songs~**

 **To those who reviewed the last chapter! Thanks a bunch!  
Oxyrus,Lecoj03 and to the Guests! Thanks for your time :D**

 **Okay so that's it with my rampant! On with the story lovely readers! Nanoha's POV!**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own magical lyrical Nanoha**

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"So that's what happened…" I mumbled to myself, closing the diary that was slightly gripped by my hands. _I knew it…it was my fault…_ I slowly looked up to Fate-chan only to be bewildered that Fate-chan was having a guilty grin on her face while looking at her right side. _Why…?_

"I told you it was my fault" she said like it wasn't a big deal. _Her…fault?_ I stared at her with disbelief as I gripped tighter the book on my hand and slightly shifted my position on the chair I am sitting to face her.

"What are you saying…? It's clearly my fault!" I half shouted to her. My cheeks were red because of frustration.

"Weren't you reading the diary, Nanoha?" she asked curling her eyebrows to me; gripping her blanket "I…it's my fault for letting you in that dangerous situation…I made the wrong decision and…I let go of your hand…"

"It's because you protected me…that…you're in this state, Fate-chan" I murmured as I bowed my head slightly, letting my bangs hid my eyes…my eyes that were producing so much tears right now. "I'm such…I-I'm…"

"I'd rather die than to let you get hurt…Nanoha" the gentle voice of the girl beside me interrupted me…she slowly hold my hand that made me look-up to her in the eyes. Her burgundy eyes shouting of sincerity and gentleness. "I'm okay, so forget it now"

"You're cruel, Fate-chan" I mumbled again to my breath but loud enough for Fate-chan to hear. She just chuckled in response.

 **Memories: It's me your lover**

 _It's been five months now since I've known Fate-chan's condition…and it just gets worse and worse every day…._ It's already past ten in the evening….I walked at the balcony of my room with my pink blanket covering my body, laid my arms on the cold railings and rested my chin on my palm. It's the twenty third of December and me and Fate-chan decided to spend the Christmas Eve with each-other on the place where I've known her condition…. It's our eleventh date since that day from the Carnival… _Yes, I'm counting it…I want to remind her that too…._ There are some cases where she forgot that we're going on a date but I tried my hardest to understand the situation. I shivered as I felt the cold breeze towards my body….

 _"But you're here, Nanoha…you'll remember everything…right?"_

Fate-chan's words from five months ago rang to my head as I gripped tighter my blanket…. _Yeah…of course I'm going to remember everything…even the slightest moment we had shared…but…_

 _But what if she treated you like a stranger?_ An unknown voice whispered in my head. I snapped my eyes wide open as I froze on my spot. _What if she pushed you away…?_ Stop it. _What if she fell in love with someone else and not you?_ No. That could not happen. _What if-_

"Stop it!" I shouted out loud full of frustration. "Stop those thoughts…please" I whispered to myself as I buried my face to my arms that were still lying on the railings. "I promised to her that I will make her remember everything…" Little tears started to form on my eyes as I imagined the face of a certain blond I love so much… "I will not leave her…even if she pushes me away…" as I slowly looked-up to the dark sky filled with countable bright stars….

"Because it's my turn to protect her"

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.

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"Yes and don't forget it, okay?" I said to the person on the other line of the phone. "Eight thirty at the tower of the Carnival, don't be late" the said person just chuckled and answered like a private soldier. "And please put a note on your wall, Fate-chan" I frowned though she couldn't see it. She laughed at the other end as she assured me that she will. I smiled a little as I bid my goodbye to her.

I glanced at the wall clock on my room; _six thirty five_. "I guess I should prepare now" I opened my closet and picked a white long sleeveless dress that almost reaches my knees with little frills at the bottom and a pair of black stockings. After almost fifteen minutes at the bathroom, I wore the said dress and the stockings, put a light make-up on my face and blower my hair that lasted for at least fifteen minutes then wore my brown knee-high boots with black buttons at the left side.

I glanced to my silver wrist watch on my left forearm; _seven fifty._ "Not bad" I praised myself as I grabbed my black leather jacket and pink scarf on the coat stand. "I'm off!" I shouted before leaving the house and head straight to my destination.

 _I'm going to turn this day to our best memories!_

 **Memories: It's me your lover**

"It's eight twenty…" I murmured to myself as I waited to the tower I said we're going to meet. _She didn't forget it…right?_ I looked to my freezing hands and slowly blew my warm breathe to them…creating a light fog in front of me. _Please don't make me think of something sad, Fate-chan…_ I sighed again and closed my eyes…when I heard a rushed footsteps getting closer and closer to me. As the sound stopped, I slowly looked in front of me…only to see a running for breathe blond smiling sheepishly to me.

"I'm not late, right?" she asked still catching her breath resting her hands on her knees. I hastily walked towards her…and embraced her as tightly as I could. She was shocked for a moment but nonetheless returned the warm hug. I shook my head to her neck as I answered her.

"Nope, a little early I must say"

I felt her smile turned to grin as we slowly pulled apart. She grabbed my hand and dragged me further inside the Carnival.

"You forgot your gloves?" she asked turning her head to me while we're running like a child. I nodded my head hesitantly as I looked to my side. She chuckled as she turned her head forward facing the road. She gripped my hand tighter, making my face quite flushed. _It's warm._

"Then I won't let go of your hand"

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.

Few hours had passed in a blink. We tried almost every ride that piqued our interest like; the Humor house, three hundred meter Bungee Jumping, Run for your life animal **_fun_** run and the **modified version level nine hundred ninety nine trip to the moon roller coaster that made me forget Fate-chan first.**

I sighed as I licked the vanilla flavored ice cream that Fate-chan bought for the two of us while sitting at one of the benches. _I couldn't believe I almost forgot Fate-chan on that ride._ I frowned to myself as I remembered the life threatening roller coaster we just ride. Fate-chan chuckled as she sat beside me after paying the ice cream.

"Do you remember me now, Nanoha?" she grinned as she teased me again. I frowned again as I turned my face to her. I was about to retort but then figured I'll just lose anyway… _so why bother?_ I looked around the Carnival that was packed with people with wide smiles on their faces…until my eyes landed on a certain red booth standing alone in the middle of the Carnival. On the door was written: Kissing Booth.

I tugged the sleeve of the girl beside me interrupting her from eating her ice cream. I pointed my index finger to the booth that got my interest. I saw her blushed after reading what was written on the door…and as if a coincidence, the booth's door opened, revealing a couple with wide smiles on their face while holding each other's hand.

I turned again to Fate-chan innocently. Noticing my ' _stare'_ to her…she hastily looked to her left side, completely trying to avoid eye contact. I grinned as I noticed that her ears turned red all of a sudden. I stood-up from the bench excitedly then got the attention of the embarrassed blond beside me.

"Let's try it, Fate-chan!"

She turned to me with shocked face I could almost laugh right at that moment but I don't want to ruin the atmosphere. I pulled her upward, making her stood beside me.

"W-what?!" she stuttered with face as red as her eyes. "But just entering there is e-embarrassing, Nanoha!" she protested as the ice cream she's holding fell to the floor. _I deeply apologize for Fate-chan to the goddess of all ice creams._ I grinned to her as I practically dragged her to the booth without getting her approval at all.

"Come-on! Don't think what others will think!"

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.

As we entered the four sided room, I immediately locked the door. It was not that big but at least two persons could get comfortable at the space. There were buttons on the side, indicating how long you want to be inside and a single light bulb on the ceiling. I turned to Fate-chan and before I could say anything, she put a hand on my mouth.

"Just. Five. Minutes." She said every word clear and strong…and I could only nod my head to that. I turned to the buttons again and clicked five minutes. I frowned a little but at least I could get to experience this with Fate-chan.

"That's too short, Fate-chan" I pouted as we both faced each other. She frowned at me and shook her head.

"Nope. That's enough"

Indicating that the time already started, the bulb on top of us turned red and before Fate-chan could turn her attention to it…I wrapped my arms to her neck and pulled her to a passionate kiss. She was caught off guard for a moment but returned the kiss by pulling me closer…. _Closer…_ I slowly moved forward causing her to step backwards…until she reached the cold wall. Pulling a part for a second we shared another heated kiss. _Fate-chan, you taste like vanilla…_ Finally losing her balance, the blond fell to her knees as I followed her…. Our battling tongues create soft moans that I suddenly want to hear more from her…. _Don't restrain it…._ As I moved my lips to her soft neck, I finally heard the endearing sound. And as I was about to wander further more to her skin…she pushed me to floor, caging me with her arms.

"It's my turn, Nanoha" she said grinning as she moved closer to my face "Let's see if you can restrain yours" I gulped as she kissed me like on a rampage…. I tried my hardest not to moan but… _I can't!_ Fate-chan moved to my neck too afterwards and as she was about to suck it…the alarm sound rang to the whole room.

I sighed in relief as the blond predator moved herself from me. "Told you it's too short" I grinned to her in a teasing manner. She pouted as she turned to her side again and mumbled something cutely.

"No fair"

I chuckled to her reaction and started to stand up from the floor. I reached out my hand to her that she gladly accepted with a smile. "Maybe next time?" I grinned to her that only caused her to blush and for me to chuckle. I intertwined our hands again and opened the booth's door. I glanced at my wrist watch and noted that in only ten minutes, the clock will strike at twelve. I looked around the Carnival again and with just a second, I found the biggest ride of the place.

 _The Ferris wheel._

"You had said before that Ferris wheel always comes last in movies" I turned to the still blushing blond beside me "Just ten minutes before Christmas, so I guess we should ride it now!" I dragged the silent blond who didn't argue and just nodded her head with a gentle smile to the biggest ride in the Carnival.

It took us at least two minutes to get on to the ride. And when we finally do, I saw the sparkling city of Uminary…covered with snow but still breath taking…. I wiped the frost on the window to get a better view as I blindly searched the hand of the girl next to me…only to find none.

I immediately turned my head to her side only to found out that she was crouching on the floor of the cab with her hands clutched on her head…

My eyes widen as I rushed to her side not knowing what to do. "Are you okay, Fate-chan?!" I asked remembering the first time I saw this moment. _Please, not now…._ I silently prayed to my mind as I hold Fate-chan's shoulders.

"I-it hurts…" she murmured to herself in so much pain while holding her head tighter…her face is burning and she's sweating a lot… "It hurts!" _What should I do? She's in pain so do something, Nanoha!_ I looked at her bag and remembered her medicine. I hastily rummaged to her bag and immediately grabbed her medicines as soon as I found them.

Fate-chan snatched the medicines from my hand as she frantically drank three tablets all at once. After a second she took another three tablets and was about to drink them too when I fortunately stopped her on time. "Fate-chan you'll overdose yourself!" I shouted to her as I took the medicines from her hand.

"But it doesn't work!" she cried in pain as she looked at me, tears starting to flow on her eyes. And I could only stare to her helplessly. I could do nothing. The girl I love so much is in great pain and I… _I couldn't do anything_. She held her aching head again and crouched down on the floor. _Why is it that I'm so useless?_ I gritted my teeth as I moved closer to the girl in pain in front of me…and hugged her tightly.

 _I know that I couldn't remove that pain, Fate-chan…but at least feel my presence that I won't leave you…._ I pulled her closer as she cried and cried on my arms…. Light screams slowly depleted to light sobs… her gripped on my jacket slowly loose its energy…her raged breathe became softer…and her sweat finally stopped.

I slowly broke the hug to check Fate-chan's condition…but as soon as I do, a sudden fear rushed to my whole body when I saw Fate-chan's innocent reaction… _Please…not now._ She stared to me for a moment as the words I wished not to hear escaped her mouth….

"W-who are you…?"

And before I knew it…tears flowed down immensely from my eyes that were still wide open from shock. I was stunned from my place and I couldn't move even an inch.

 ** _But what if she treated you like a stranger?_**

The same unknown voice whispered to my head again…as tears didn't stop from falling down to my cheeks.

 ** _What if she pushed you away…?_**

I stared at the blond who is looking at me with curious burgundy eyes I got addicted so much….

 ** _What if she fell in love with someone else and not you?_**

I crouched down and buried my face on my hands as I was filled with despair and sadness… _I thought I was ready but…all this time I was hoping that this moment will never happen…!_ The tears from my eyes falling down just gotten worse.

 ** _"But you're here, Nanoha…you'll remember everything…right?"_**

I snapped my eyes wide open as I remembered Fate-chan's words again echoing to my ears… _Fate-chan…?_ I unconsciously imagined her smiling face towards me….I gritted my teeth as I remembered the first time I've known her condition…. _That's right…I promised to her…_ I slowly looked up to the still curious blond in front of me…the blond who I grew-up with but…was now looking at me with a stranger's eyes.

 ** _"Narrate it all to me…make me fall in love with you all over again."_**

I wiped the tears on my face uselessly… _Even if you treated me like a stranger and pushed me away…I will not leave you…no matter how long it takes…I'll make you fall for me again and remember all the memories we shared…_ and tried my hardest to give the best smile I could afford…

.

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"It's me, your lover"

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 **A/N: *bows* Thank you for reading :D I hope you felt the FEELS xD if not I guess I failed as an angst writer… :3 Chapter four will take a while to be released if you're wondering…so I'm sorry :( I need to sort out the plot and the other things in this story…. So yeah, And Oh! About that ice cream scene! I think eating an ice cream on a cold night is the best! xD**

 **And in case you forgot that little box below this… xD please take your time to click it and type your thoughts about this story :D**

 **Ja ne!**


	4. memories: Chapter 4

Oh, it feels like years since I last updated this. I reread this story before going to sleep and then realized my high school self could write some interesting trash. So I decided to continue this trash, after all, lol I really thought of dropping this story on chapter three because I can't think of a good continuation without a cliché plot...and cliché things cringes me a little on the inside...okay this is too long already. Btw, I reuploaded the chapter one. I think it's the worst trash I've ever read...so I kinda clean it a bit.

Enjoy the chapter 4, guys!

Disclaimer: I don't own Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha

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It has been a week since Fate-chan lost her memory...her memory was restarted from that incident five years ago. "Fate-chan..." I murmured to myself as I stared at the entrance of the hospital Fate-chan is currently in. I bowed my head a little, restraining my tears to fall down again... _No...you can't cry again...you must be strong, Nanoha. You must be strong for Fate-chan._ I clenched my fist and proceeded to enter the hospital.

 _Don't worry, Fate-chan. I will definitely fulfill my promise._

 **Memories**

As I was about to enter Fate-chan's room, Fate-chan's mother walked out of it. I noticed her sad expression and immediately thought it must be very hard for her family too... This is the only way Fate-chan could still live...they agreed to this solution five years ago...but agreeing never meant feeling okay with it.

As soon as Precia saw me on the door, she smiled a little, trying to hide her feelings. "You're finally here, Nanoha" she said as she moved a little from the door way. I nodded my head as I returned the little smile. "It must be hard on you...starting all over from the start with Fate..." I nodded my head again while gripping my bag on my shoulder a little. I can't look at her...I can't look at anyone at this state. "If ever Fate hurt you, don't hesitate to say it to me. I'll give that kid a beating if she ever tried to." My smile grew as I gave my girlfriend's mom a hug all of a sudden.

"I promise...I will not leave your daughter" I said as sincere as possible. She hugged me back a little too tight...making me feel her sadness deep down. She nodded her head and whispered a small thank you. After we broke the hug, Precia left with a better smile on her face.

I stared at Fate-chan's room...thinking if I'm ready enough to enter this four-sided closed space. _Maybe I'm still not ready...but there's no way I would run away from her._ I knocked on the door twice and then slowly opened the door...revealing the vulnerable form of the girl I missed so much...staring at the window as if nothing else mattered. I just stood there, staring at her like the time has just stopped...until she noticed my presence and looked at me. She stared at me with a blank expression, as if examining if I'm a stranger or not... I didn't say a word...letting her to do the first move and say what she thinks I am.

"You're that crying baby at the carnival"

I froze on my spot.

Fixing my composure, I started to walk towards her and took the chair beside her bed. _She doesn't know how sad I am that time...sad is even an understatement!_ As soon as I got myself comfortable on the chair, I looked to Fate-chan at the eyes seriously and then corrected her.

"Nope. My name is Nanoha Takamachi and I'm your lover"

Fate-chan stared at me for a second until she broke it to look at her other side. _I wonder what's her expression right now._

"That's what you said at that time too," she said with little emotion. I smiled a little, knowing that she remembered my confession that time. "You're lucky if I believe you that fast" _That's true. It's not like she could just accept that when someone she doesn't know said that out of the blue._

"But maybe you're lucky," she said making me widen my eyes from shock. She grabbed something on her back, revealing a small notebook that is very familiar to me. _Fate-chan's diary._ "I spent all my time reading that...and guess I could somehow believe you because of that notebook. Your name is written all over there after all." she sounds a little annoyed but for now I don't really care about that. I stared at Fate-chan's diary and somehow...I want to hug it so much.

"C-can I...read it?" I asked while still staring at the diary intently.

"Why are you even asking now?" My eyes widen at her question. "You didn't even ask for her permission that time when you snatched her diary to know what happened five years ago" I stared at new Fate-chan, wondering how she knew that...and as if answering my question in mind, she replied "It is also written there. That Fate you knew really likes writing, huh?"

I looked back at the diary and slowly get it from her hand. _Just touching it...feels like I was touching Fate-chan again...all my memories with her flew like a stream at once._ The new Fate-chan looked at me silently as I flipped through the pages without a word...until I saw a letter not addressed to her diary Bardiche, but to her future self...

"Be sure to read it at your head...it's making me cringe a little" Fate-chan said as she now looked at her side again. I nodded my head despite knowing that she won't see that gesture...still looking straight at the diary. _So Fate-chan even wrote to herself..._

 _Dear Fate of the future,_

 _Writing to your future-self feels really weird..but I feel like this will be really helpful to that brunette when that time comes. Listen here, future self! I know that you don't remember anything now that you're reading this. You're probably confused to all the people around you and doesn't want to trust any of them. I know that you will be stubborn because I know that I'm really stubborn. But please...just with this letter...please believe me, your past-self._

 _Mom will probably cry when she saw you. She constantly assures me that she's ready whenever that time happened...but I know she's lying, of course. I'm her daughter after all. Also, the fact that even I...am not ready to greet you. I constantly pray that you will not come into my life. I'm harsh, right?_

 _Putting my feelings aside, I want you to be at least not hostile to the people around you...a lot of people love me, you know?_

 _More importantly...there's this person I don't want you to hurt the most...and was actually the reason why I wrote to you. Her name is Nanoha Takamachi...I know that this will make you cringe but words are not enough to express my love for her... I'm not asking you to love her the instant you read this letter...I just want you to not push her away...please. Though I'm sure you'll love her soon, anyway. Also, she's a good kisser mind you._

 _I'm sure she will keep on approaching you and pamper you with love. Just thinking about it makes me jealous. I practically want to kill you now, just so you know. She may be clumsy at times and a little cry baby, but she's really cute that you just want to hug her forever. Her slim figure, her soft lips and skin and that eyes that could make you stun forever...-okay I'll stop._

 _But seriously...I just love her so much that I want to ensure my future self will not hurt her. I know she'll really suffering now while you're reading this letter...just imagining it makes me want to kill myself for making her experience this... I would constantly keep myself awake, thinking maybe, I should have just push myself out of her world that time so she wouldn't be hurt when I forgot all the things about her...but I also know she would hate that more. The only thing I ask for you...is to keep staying by her side. Don't hurt her and...keep protecting her. Please...my future-self...do not make her suffering much more unbearable..._

 _I know I'm pushing a lot of myself to you...I'm sorry...but I know that you will still live your life the way you want to, despite reading this letter. If you really do, don't be such a jerk and be something that I could be proud of! Because if you don't, I will punch you in the face so hard that me, your past-self, will come back!_

 _And lastly...welcome to this world. I wish that you will have a good experience from this moment on, my future self, the future Fate._

 _Yours truly,_

 _Fate of the past_

"Fate-chan you idiot..." I silently whispered not even bothering to hide the tears flowing on my cheeks. I hugged the diary tightly on my chest...imagining the face of its owner... "You don't have to worry that much about me..."

"I agree, she's really an idiot" I heard the new Fate-chan sitting beside me whispered to herself. "How could she even punch me if she's no longer here" she turned towards me and then looked at my eyes with seriousness. "She's right with one thing, though." she turned her body towards me, the setting sun illuminates her form very well through the window... "I will live my life the way I want to. I may believe that you're my lover, but that doesn't mean I will love you with those mere words from the diary" pausing a little and getting me off guard...her serious gaze towards me change a little to a gentle one and a small smile for the first time on this day, was formed on her face. "...so hurry up and make me fall in love with you again, with your own effort"

I stared at her truly stunned by her words...I feel like the past Fate-chan is looking at me right now...no. That's not right. There is no past and future Fate-chan. This girl in front of me is still her. The girl I love so much. She may forget the past, everything about me, but everything about her is still the same. She will still be that idiotic, dunce but somehow sweet and cool, Fate-chan.

A wide smile appeared on my face as I nodded my head and gladly respond to her request,

" _You better be ready for that, my dear girlfriend"_

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A/N: I don't have anything to say :| I just hope you enjoyed this chapter :). Oh, there's going to be a new Nanoha movie soon! So heads up fellow NanoFate fans~ I hope they'll keep Fate as cool as the old one T.T okay, that's all!

Ja ne!


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